TMP's Live Birthday Party 2015!

One of my favorite games - Glass Jokes!!

Tell us a joke about glass, glass blowers or glassblowing! You may enter this game as many times as you'd like, but please only one entry per post! This game will also run for an extended amount of time. You have until 12/31/15 to enter.

This game is so hard to pick only one winner for, so there will be 3 winners! Each will receive a $50 gift certificate towards cases of us33 glass at http://www.eu-glass.com! Thanks, EU Glass!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by EU Glass

EU Glass Inc. is an importer and wholesaler of high quality 33 expansion borosilicate glass products ranging from Schott BORO ARTISTIC®, SCHOTT DURAN®, SCHOTT CONTURAX®, Lenz Laborglass, Glassco Labs, Glass Alchemy, Trautman Art Glass, Dichroic Alchemy, The Ti Pen, West County Millefiori, Marble Molds by Mike Close and Griffin Glass tools.

Our borosilicate tubing and rod, as well as, the industry's leading glass on glass ground joint fittings are all using glass made in Germany by the globally renowned company, Schott.

The glass ground joints we carry are manufactured exclusively for us by Lenz Laborglas using Schott DURAN®. Our bushing adaptors are produced by the absolute best glass manufacturer in India, Glassco Labs.

We are constantly bringing exciting materials to the Artistic Glassblowing Communities and Scientific Lampworking Markets to insure the best products are available for everyone.

EU Glass Inc. offers a reliable source for supply & production needs small to large in North America & beyond.

---

Attachment 80394



Thank you again, EU Glass! You ROCK!! :blowkiss:

Winner will be announced by 1/2/15 so keep the jokes coming. :D

I can't really be active because I'm at a Christmas party with my friends but have fun guys!

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I317 using Tapatalk

If I look it up, and find I cheated Dan, I will make it up , and then some via USPS.

Not going to dig till the a.m.

Happy birthday TMP! Just got back from star wars, and here to party now!

Q-tip tech

How do you hide money from a glassblower? Put it under the soap!

Sent from my PLT7649G using Tapatalk

how do glass blowers spend there money?

what money?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by BoRo

If I look it up, and find I cheated Dan, I will make it up , and then some via USPS.

Not going to dig till the a.m.

---

I wouldn't have won anyway. It was a set. The chandlier, sconces, and a functional skull. Don't worry about it.

Did you hear about the glass blower who accidentally inhaled? He ended up with a pane in his stomach!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by mattholimeau

Happy birthday TMP! Just got back from star wars, and here to party now!

---

Whadya think? I go with A-, my wife is leaning towards C+.

Gonna have to go with the oldest one in the book, mainly cause I can't think of anything. lol.

What is the difference between a glassblower and a large pizza?

Large pizza can feed a family of four.

I thought it was freaking amazing. Everything I wanted and then some.

how do you starve a glassblower.... give them a full tank of liquid and propane

what does a glassblower have in common with a guy in a room with three hookers?

in both instances, something is probably getting triple blown.

"....your one and a half inch glass pickle is ready!! It sparkles and glows really bright!!" True Story...

You know the difference between a glass artist and a mutual fund, right? Eventually a mutual fund matures and makes money.

It was lacking in the dark side in my eyes, needed more evil and better bad guy but overall star wars was good

Sent from my PLT7649G using Tapatalk

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Jimi The Don

what does a glassblower have in common with a guy in a room with three hookers?

in both instances, something is probably getting triple blown.

---

:rollin

Going Monday, can't wait :)

How do you make 1 million dollars blowing glass?
Start with 2

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Dan Kooper

Q-tip tech

---

This is my joke.

why doesn't the glassblower worry about you stealing his gurlfriend?
he doesn't have one.

why doesn't the glassblower worry about you stealing his gurlfriend?
he doesn't have one.

Its considered a joke to mix soft glass into the noobs bench.

I can tell instantly , but some can't.

Thanks Gray matter. Super funny to watch..

Love!!

Wow this is utterly depressing now

Sent from my PLT7649G using Tapatalk

Since the jokes one has an extended entry time, I'm going to post the last game shortly. :)

what did the glassblower give his children for christmas?
disappointment.

Last game?!? Ohnoes!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by mattholimeau

I thought it was freaking amazing. Everything I wanted and then some.

---

Agreed. Totally. Can't wait to go back, though apparently not with my cold hearted super fan of a wife.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Jimi The Don

what does a glassblower have in common with a guy in a room with three hookers?

in both instances, something is probably getting triple blown.

---

Love this!!!

This next game you're going to need a camera for!

what the difference's between a noob and a master about "tree fiddy"

What is it called when Salt and Buck hangout together?

Jerky

24 hours to play this one - TMP love note!

To enter write a note that says "I love TMP!" in some fashion, and take a photo of the note in a selfie, or with a glass related item if you're shy. It can be your favorite tool off your bench, something handmade of glass, or a glass themed shirt/hat/hoodie etc. BONUS! If you post a selfie and you're wearing a glass theme shirt/hat/hoodie it will be worth more entries. If you're wearing a TMP shirt or button, it will receive the highest points possible! The more creative the TMP love note, the better! :D My daughter drew this kick ass I Heart TMP note as an example.

Attachment 80395


Winner will receive this gorgeous sculpture made and donated by Steven p. Selchow and a $50 gift certificate to Glasscraft!

Steven has been blowing glass over 40 years, and brings a unique style and a ton of knowledge to our table!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Steven

8" high fantasy woman with dichro marble on manzanita base.

---

Awesome, thank you Steven! :blowkiss:

Attachment 80396




www.GlasscraftInc.com has been a continuous supporter of TMP over the years, and an important part our community at large. They carry a vast variety of tools and glass supplies in two locations, as well as offering studio classes and webinars. They have been a big part in the glass movement since 1970! In 2009 they made a very smart move and partnered up with Winship. Together they build an even stronger foundation in our industry. Go Glasscraft! :D Thank you for supporting TMP!


Attachment 80397




You have 24 hours to enter. Winner will be announced tomorrow night! :D

I must be the one guy who is for sure not going to see star wars, but i am going see unknown hinson in feb

Funny joke

Quote:

---

"I'm going to post the last game shortly. "

---

You win

"Just put it to your mouth and blow."

"Oooh, it's really hard," she said.

"You're doing well," I assured her.

"It's getting bigger," she panted.

"That's great," I said, "now keep going."

"Daddy I'm so hot," she breathlessly said.

"Don't stop, keep going, keep going," I said, excitedly, "that's good."

"Am I better than mummy?" she asked.

"Of course you are darling, when she tried glass blowing she was bloody useless."

Courtesy of Sickipedia.org: http://www.sickipedia.org/sex-and-sh...#ixzz3upW8sTEf

how did the glassblower respond when asked how he gets the colour in there?
"you start with just the tip and then one thing leads to another.."

Haiku:
Supply Addiction
Hording Everything Glowing
Never Makes A Thing